How can I ensure my Evil Tower is always stormy?
It's been a good year for me as an Evil Overlord. Lots of princess kidnapping turned into sizable ransoms, several of my Doomsday Devices were sold for high prices at auction, and my Minions have been working harder than ever. In fact, I'd like to think I'm moving up the Evil Overlord ladder.
To capitalize on my profits and cement my position in the world, I've decided to construct an Evil Tower somewhere in the world. It's going to be ~500 meters tall, and I've got the blueprints more or less figured out, but it doesn't quite scream "evil". Yet.
To guarantee that everyone knows exactly who they're messing with, I'd like to have a persistent storm cloud hovering above my tower.
Goals:
At least half a kilometer high and a kilometer in diameter, ideally floating a few hundred meters above the top of my tower
Must be stable and persistent under most weather conditions. This will depend on the suggested location, but the cloud should be present at least 90% of the time
The cloud does not need to be composed of the normal H2O molecules, but answers using more common and less environmentally disruptive substances will be preferred
Ideally, the cloud will not produce large quantities of rain but some precipitation (less than 1 meter per year) is acceptable
The cloud is dark grey or black (none of those cute sheep-looking cumulus clouds)
The cloud occasionally discharges lightning bolts to carefully positioned lightning rods in the top of my tower
How can I engineer my Evil Tower or the surrounding environment to fulfill the above requirements?
This post was sourced from https://worldbuilding.stackexchange.com/q/125884. It is licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0.
1 answer
It may be a good year for Evil Overlords, but I want you to take a moment out of your busy day to consider the welfare of those whose lives (well, OK, "existences") are not going as well as yours. There are those who are down on their luck, who wonder if they'll be there to wake with another dawn, whose lives (or whatever) have become sad and somber, with no flash, bang, and boom anymore. Yes, that's right - I'm talking about...unemployed former storm gods. City states, kingdoms, and empires rise and fall - and with them rise and fall the fortunes of those deities who started out being worshiped in some remote mountain village with nothing more for an altar than a flattish chunk of wood wedged between two convenient rocks - but who, over time, came to have thousands upon thousands of chanting worshipers, mumbling priests, sacrifices galore! - but who have now fallen on hard times. So please, Mr. Evil Dark Overlord - please consider employing one of these gods to maintain the eternal storm clouds around your tower. They ask nothing more than a little kindness - perhaps a priest to offer up the occasional burnt incense - and maybe a virgin or two sacrificed around the holidays? Is it too much to ask that they be shown some warmth of spirit and some kindness, every once in a while? So open your pockets - open your homes (well, OK, dark towers) - open your hearts, and give. Give, until it hurts (someone else, by preference).
Bless you.
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